A plague on your house, HBO

I was so looking forward to this!

Dancing with himself

Thank you, whoever made this much-needed super cut.

Oscars Liveblog!

5:58 Hi everyone! Remember -- refresh to see updates. Let's do this!

6:02 Oh, Seacrest. I've missed you, you elegant bastard.

6:03 Jennifer Lawrence looks beautiful - a little casual for the Oscars and exactly like ScarJo's a couple years ago, but still beautiful - but I wish she was a better interview.

6:12 Melissa Leo's dress is baaaad. Really curious to see if she'll pull off a win tonight after those horrendous ads.

6:15 "He did his award show and he bombed!" -James Franco on Ricky Gervais. Awesome. Awesome, awesome, awesome. James Franco will get the Oscar tonight for "Best Example of Guilelessness." Saying what everyone's thinking (in a way that is somehow not vicious): my favorite thing about him.

6:32 Wait, are they not allowing Giuliana on the red carpet this year? She's been stuck up in that "fashion sky box" since 6 PM...

6:33 Hooray, Russell Brand! With his mum! WAIT! "Perhaps I'll kiss you," he says, and kisses Ryan on the cheek. (No, I'm not kidding.) It's Christian Bale syndrome - when everything looks like it's gone swimmingly, he does something completely inappropriate and genius. I actually met Russell Brand this past summer and I'm happy to report he is exactly like this in real life.

6:36 Michelle Williams always looks so delicate. Like if someone was speaking next to her too loudly she might break.

6:40 Amy Adams keeps saying how nervous she is, and it's incredibly endearing.

6:52 Jesse Eisenberg!! I just yelped. Is it just me, or does it look like it would be kind of easy to sneak into the Oscars? It's obviously not, but I feel like if I just showed up in a gown and started waving to fans confidently...

7:00 Kevin Spacey's advice to Jeremy Renner: "Just have fun, and find the bar as quickly as you can."

7:03 Loving Scarlett Johansson's hair. But not her dress.

7:09 JT! I saw a music video of his on TV this morning and for a split second was like Oh yeaaah, Justin Timberlake was a pop star! Crazy. Justin, mission accomplished.

7:13 Why is Oprah presenting tonight? GO AWAY, OPRAH.

7:20 Eleanna text when Helena Bonham Carter showed up: "I killed Sirius Black."

7:21 I just screamed as if I was being murdered upon seeing Andrew Garfield. Have I really become this person?

7:26 Off topic and I don't really care, but Justin Timberlake no longer brings Jessica Biel to awards shows. Like, not one this whole season. Hmmmm.

7:27 Christian Bale! He looks so happy and he won't let go of his wife's hand. I melt.

7:34 Gwennie, you can do better than that dress. But God, is she gorgeous. She really, really is. It's almost inhuman.

7:38 Christian Bale, on whether or not his family gets concerned about his commitment to his roles: "They know I'm a stubborn git."

7:40 Sandra Bullock in red. Yawn. Do these people's stylists talk to each other beforehand? They should. Everyone's in red!

7:44 RDJ posing, I guess, for the crowd? I don't know. Doing something great with his face.

8:03 E! Preshow is over for some reason, so I've switched to ABC. Just in times for James Franco! Already inside the Kodak Theater, chilling in a chair.

8:05 Bwahahahahaaa, he just started laughing to himself at a joke he made that the interviewer didn't understand. Maybe an inside joke with himself. I have those.

8:38 That opening lost steam a couple minutes in. Reaction shots. Everyone is smiling. Because they can't not. It's James Franco!

8:40 This is awkwardly un-funny. Why are they doing this weird family thing? Wait, the Marky Mark joke is funny. Mark, throw something.

8:57 Melissa Leo wins for Best Supporting Actress. Well deserved. Those ads, though, woman...you got lucky!

8:58 Helena Bonham Carter must have practiced her nice face in the mirror after the Golden Globes.

8:59 Melissa Leo just dropped the F bomb. Helloooo.

9:01 Ugh, that was a little overzealous. She stole Kirk Douglas' cane as if she was so shocked she couldn't walk. Anne Hathaway continues to be un-funny.

9:02 "I'm Banksy." That was good! That was good.

9:13 What's with the white tuxes, men?

9:15 Sorkin wins for Best Adapted Screenplay, of course. Who is that blonde next to him? Where is Chenoweth? Oh, Jesse gets up to hug him, and I might lose it. "For my mom and dad, who made a life for me so I could be a part of nights like this." Beautiful, but we expect nothing less.

9:20 The King's Speech screenwriter, who just won for Best Original Screenplay: "The writer's speech. This is terrifying." Hah! He dedicates the award to all the stutterers of the world. "We have a voice, we have been heard." Tremendous.

9:25 James Franco in a dress. I am not surprised.

9:29 Reese Witherspoon, that happens to be Julia Roberts' dress and hair from the year she won Best Actress.

9:32 Mark Ruffalo thanks the camera. So gracious. And Christian Bale wins, thank goodness. First words of his acceptance speech: "Bloody hell." He starts crying as he thanks his wife. "I didn't think I was like this!" Please, more awards for Christian Bale in the future.

9:42 Pretty sure the awards are now boring until about 11:30. This is why the Golden Globes is the best show of awards season. Any way! Just went over to the Jezebel liveblog, and there was this gem: "Justin Timberlake is not Banksy. We would believe it if James Franco claimed to be Banksy, but not JT. Sorry." YES. FRANCO IS BANSKY. Note to self: start this rumor.

9:45 David Fincher getting lots of shout outs tonight, as he should be. His daughter is beautiful!

10:02 It's Kevin Spacey! With a George Clooney joke! And Mandy Moore looking pretty!

10:09 Wait a minute, that's Adrien Brody singing in a Stella Artois ad. Whaaat?

10:18 WAIT, WHAT IS THIS? THIS IS HILARIOUS!

10:20 That was just the best thing to ever happen to the Oscars. Auto-tuning.

10:40 Is Banksy there tonight? Or did he just skip out on the whole thing?

10:43 I don't have time to check it out, but apparently James Franco is real-time tweeting this whole thing, complete with backstage pictures and videos. Who knew he'd like Twitter so much? He joined like a week ago and tweets more than I do.

10:44 Gwenyth in a new dress! I like it.

10:52 That Randy Newman award just reminded me I haven't listened to the Ragtime soundtrack in a while. Just in time for me to mute Celine Dion and play "Back to Before"!

11:02 Catherine Bigelow! Hooray! Where might you be, James Cameron? Somewhere far away, I hope, feeling sorry for yourself. As you were.

11:03 Weeeelll, I now understand why Elvis shot so many of his TV sets. Fincher just lost Best Director - went to Tom Hooper for The King's Speech instead. A ridiculous snub, and one that does not bode well for Social Network's Best Picture chances.

11:11 I love how James Franco is just as annoyed with Anne Hathaway as I am.

11:16 Even Natalie doesn't look surprised when she wins (for Best Actress, if you've been living under a rock).

11:19 Play her offffff!

11:20 Weird to see Sandra up there after what happen after last year's Oscars. Someone on Jezebel after the clip of Michelle Williams: "CREEK FOREVER.

11:23 The visible and audible love for Jesse Eisenberg just made up (if only a little) for the Fincher snub. A huge round of applause, and a shot of Justin Timberlake looking so excited for him.

11:24 HAH, the shot of James Franco backstage. I don't know what's up with James Franco tonight. He's too weird for this stuff.

11:25 Colin Firth. Time for a charming, British speech!

11:30 Well, less charming than I expected. He seemed a little scattered. But I couldn't care less. Mr. Darcy has his Oscar..

11:35 Yes! Shot of Andrew smashing Jesse's laptop.

11:36 Biggest applause for True Grit, The Social Network, and Toy Story 3. But Best Picture goes to The King's Speech. Ughhhhhhhh. Someone get me Fincher's reaction shot. I'm going to make it my profile picture.

11:37 Well, I don't need to stick around for this acceptance speech. Goodnight, you princes and princesses, and thank you for reading. I appreciate it more than I can say. The next and only legitimate awards show (besides the Globes) is the Emmys in September (TV! TV! TV!), so we have that to look forward to. Oscars, I'm shaking my head.

90210ers

The whole gang on set, in a picture tweeted by one of their directors. I love casts that love each other.

Glee "Blame It On The Alcohol" Recap: Being Drunk’s A Lot Like Loving You

Glee, you self-fulfilling prophecy, you. A few bad episodes? Time for a really good, reminiscent-of-season-one, keep-the-viewers-coming-back-for-more episode!

It’s a shame that I’ve gotten so sick of this show that when the promos for Tuesday’s episode showed the kids getting drunk together, I was honestly thrilled. Why? BECAUSE NOTHING HAPPENS ON GLEE ANY MORE. Every episode goes as follows: Finn and Rachel break up and get back together, and Kurt cries, and Sue tries to bring down Glee Club, and the Glee kids finally accept that they are outsiders. And they never leave school. Getting out of McKinely is the best thing the show ever does for itself (hello, Kurt-Mercedes-Rachel sleepover), but those moments are few and far in between. 

But the strangest thing about Tuesday’s episode wasn’t that the kids were out of their element; it was that I hated all the music and still liked this episode! The dialogue was strong and the episode wasn’t too serious and so much was going on that it was able to stay afloat.

On to the recap: Figgins calls Will into his office and says that the school has an “epidemic” – kids are showing up to school drunk. He asks Will to have the Glee kids do a song at assembly that educates on the dangers of drinking. Because people think the Glee kids are super cool, so they will definitely listen.

Puck asks Rachel to have a party at her house this weekend because he is somehow aware that her dads are away – “this is the kind of information a guy like me tends to know.” I actually love their chemistry and this scene is adorable because she’s clearly charmed by him. Rachel tells him her dads left her alone because they trust her to be responsible, and Puck tells her “they left you alone because you suck.” HAH.

Rachel is trying to write original songs for Regionals, so she sings a really crap one for Finn called “My Headband.” Errr…Gossip Girl? Is that you? He tells her it’s crap, which is good of him, I guess, and that she needs to experience things outside of her comfort zone to write a good song.

Cue a 24-style split screen phone conversation with Santana and Brittany, Mercedes and Artie, and Puck. Puck can score some wine coolers, so “The Rachel Berry House Party Train Wreck Extravaganza is a go.”

Blaine and Kurt arrive, and LE SIGH, Blaine looks even cuter in normal-people clothes than in his Warblers uniform. Soon everyone is there and it’s lame so everyone wants to leave. Puck says the only way they’re going to stay is if Rachel lets him break into her dad’s liquor cabinet.

And then it’s the obligatory shots of everyone getting wrecked, including one of Santana doing a tequila shot off of Brittany’s stomach. Ryan Murphy, there’s ridiculous, and then there’s ridiculous. But then there’s Lea Michele’s perfect delivery of “IT TASTES LIKE PINK!” after chugging a wine cooler. And the shot of Blaine dancing around wildly. And Finn acting like he’s above it all because he’s the designated driver, and Quinn being a wet blanket, which finally gave me a legitimate reason to hate them both. And Santana being a sad, insecure drunk. And Artie shouting “making it raaaaiiin!” And these are the things, Murphy, that redeem you and your stupid show all over again.

Spin the Bottle time! Blaine and Rachel kiss, and it’s weird, because it goes on for a little too long. But we all know he’s going to question his sexuality this week so whatever. Then they sing “Don’t you Want Me, Baby,” one of my least favorite songs ever. But it didn’t really piss me off that much! Maybe it is easier to watch Glee cover bad songs that I don’t care about then to see them cover good songs I love and butcher them with too much auto tune.

Morning after. Burt finds Blaine in Kurt’s bed. We all know nothing happened, but Burt doesn’t, and he’s freaked out, especially because Kurt doesn’t even mention it.

Back to McKinely. Tina: “I need to close my locker and it’s going to sound like a gunshot.” Hah. The crew is all hung over. Artie gives them bloody marys – hair of the dog, he says. They all drink up and sing “Blame it on the Alcohol.” Another song I don’t like at all. But actually, the dance moves are fun and they look like they’re having a blast. And it’s great to see Mercedes’ voice featured for a whole song instead of Rachel’s. Schu loves it. They are so good at acting drunk! Uhhh, they are drunk, you dolt. Sidenote: These ridiculously extravagant sets that somehow pop up in the auditorium and the matching costumes and choreographed light shows…harder and harder to let slip. Partly because all Schu ever does is complain about the Glee Club budget.

Rachel gives a little bow when Schu compliments their performance, and then proceeds to tell him his vest is cute and he is “all kinds of awesome.” Again, Lea Michele is fantastic in this scene and actually beginning to prove she can play something other than herself. But Schu tells them that the song glorifies alcohol rather than educates on it. The kids tell him he's out of touch. They are already aware of the dangers of alcohol and this whole thing is a waste of time.

Kurt is giving Blaine hell about kissing Rachel at the party when she happens to call Blaine and ask him out. He says yes, and Kurt kind of loses it. But Blaine tells him that when they kissed “it felt good,” and he’s never even had a boyfriend before, and he feels like this is the time to figure things out. Maybe he’s bisexual. Kurt says that “bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they wanna hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change.” Hmm. Not sure what side the show is on here. Kurt is obviously upset because his role model, who has always been sure of his sexuality, is now questioning it, but clearly he’s also jealous of Rachel.

Schu tells Beiste that maybe the kids were right; maybe he is out of touch. He certainly doesn’t do anything for fun lately. So she invites him to her fave honky-tonk bar, where they sing a stupid country song together and he proceeds to get black out drunk. She takes him home and he drunk dials Emma (Schu, always with the maturity) and leaves her an embarrassing “Hey there sexy lady…there’s something I reaaaallly reeeeallly want to say to you” voicemail. We don’t get to hear the rest of it. Yet.

Kurt is over helping Rachel clean up after the party, or as she rightly assesses, trying to figure out how her date with Blaine went. She says it was great, but they didn't kiss. Kurt tells Rachel he’s sure she and Blaine have a lot in common, but in all honesty, they don’t have chemistry. Rachel says she’s going to kiss Blaine sober and if the chemistry is still there, then Kurt will have to "eat a slice of humble pie."

Will is hung over at school the next day when he bumps into Emma and apologizes for the drunk dial, but she didn’t get a single message. Golly, folks, I wonder who he called by accident. Sue Sylvester! There you are! She tells him she got the message and says something about finally having the tools to take him down. The usual.

Kurt's house, where he is being a little bitch to his Dad. Seriously, the profanity is not for affect. He’s being a brat. He finally admits it’s about Blaine liking Rachel. Burt brings up the other night and tells Kurt he needs to ask before he has a guy sleep over. Kurt pulls the “you’re uncomfortable with it because I’m gay” card, which is such BS, because it’s obviously not about that at all. Burt couldn’t be more accepting of Kurt’s sexuality. He just doesn’t want his kid having sex under his roof. He would say the same to Finn if he had a girl sleep over. It’s settled, then, but Kurt gives Burt the least sincere apology I’ve seen in a while.

The kids are about to perform at the assembly, but they’re nervous because they haven’t rehearsed and something always goes wrong when they perform at school. Rachel has made a cocktail that sounds positively revolting, and everyone takes shot of it – “To Ke$ha!” They perform Tick Tock, which is great (there’s an adorable shot of Beiste singing along) until Brittany and Santana vomit.

The next day. Sue is on the school intercom, condemning the Glee Club for their performance. She calls Schu an “alcoholic teen vomit fetishist,” which is perfect, and plays his voicemail for the whole school, in which he tells Emma that he loves the way she eats her lunch with plastic gloves, and proposes “one night of getting crazy, rolling around in the hay.” Emma hears the whole thing, of course, and is obviously embarrassed but also visibly touched.

The Glee Club comes into Figgins’ office, all ready to get suspended, and he’s like “That special-effect vomiting was awesome! No one wants to drink any more! Good job!” Saaaaaweeeettttt. And Schu gets a free pass because Figgins’ pastor has agreed to talk to him, to which Schu is like, “Sure thing man! Never happening!”

Glee Club reunites in the classroom. Rachel never wants to drink again, Brittany says the assembly performance wouldn’t have worked without it. Schu gives them a pretty legit lecture, telling them what they did was not only unprofessional and stupid, it was illegal. Quinn, stupid snarky loser that she is, tells Schu that “it’s a fair amount of the pot calling the kettle black.” Brittany, in her best line in a while: “That is so racist.” Schu says he knows how hypocritical he sounds, so he’s going to stop drinking. He has more to live for. Like what? He doesn’t answer. Any way, he gives the kids sheets to sign, pledges to stop drinking until after Regionals. He puts his cell phone number in the corner just in case they feel tempted or ever need a designated driver. Everyone signs.

Rachel and Kurt are at the coffee shop waiting for Blaine, and it looks like Kurt has come around. He tells Rachel that she should rethink this whole kiss thing – no good can come of it, and no matter how he feels about Blaine, he doesn’t want Rachel getting hurt. But Blaine comes in and Rachel kisses him any way, and he’s like, “Yep, I’m gay. 100% gay.” And she isn’t hurt at all, actually. She’s psyched, because she had a 5 second relationship with a gay guy, so now she has lived! She has material to write a song about! And as we used to say at summer camp, a good day was had by all.

Quick shout-outs: Community had a pitch-perfect episode this Thursday, so much so that I didn’t want to write about it for fear of ruining it. If you're not watching that show, I can't fully explain just how much you're missing out. And props to 30 Rock for calling out Jezebel. Still one of my favorite websites, but they needed to be called out – for God’s sake, they write about “how far we’ve come and which women have the worst beach bodies.” It is a wonderful website, but it is a difficult website. (30 Rock also gets extra points this week because Jack said this to a teacher: “Quiet, Chalk Hands. A real man is talking.”) And finally, to Hugh Laurie, who continues to deliver on House. The last scene of Monday's episode was heartbreaking. He is at his best when the material is the most uncomfortable.

And finally, a reminder: liveblogging the Oscars tomorrow! Be sure to stop by! 

Everything Black Swan related is a bad idea

Gawker posted an article on this woman who tried "The Black Swan Diet" to lose five pounds before her wedding day. This meant all vegetarian meals, ballet classes, blah blah blah, you can read about it here. But the article, in a very non-Gawker like, non-snarky way, calls the woman out for trying a diet/exercise regimen that Natalie Portman did for a year to look the way she did. Not only does the author tell us that "endlessly vying to emulate her/him is only going to drive you as insane as she goes in the movie," there's this:

"They are famous people with nothing to do but diet, exercise, and tend to their bodies and they have unlimited resources and all sorts of assistance to do so. The rest of us have jobs, strange food cravings, lazy days, and incidental circumstances that keep us from the gym. There isn't something fundamentally wrong with us, we're just normal."

How about that. I've never been so happy to be normal. And Gawker, there may be hope for you yet.

Happiness

My favorite motley crew, minus Chevy Chase. This is a scan from a magazine, and he's on the other page. Thank goodness. Or else I would have had to title this post "Unhappiness." Sorry, Chevy...it's just that you suck.

Good news!

And about damn time, too.

Damn you, Mchale

In a video that is 1 minute and 39 seconds long, Joel McHale has unintentionally made a short film of my life. He says things like "I guess I have to watch these [movies] now...why is my life so hard?" which I believe my friends would tell you is all I ever say, and also displays completely inappropriate reactions to Oscar-nominated movies, which is all I ever do (ex: this blog). Oops?

Oh ma ga

If this is legit, I will be the happiest girl in the world.

For every well-intentioned, honest reporter...

there's a whole magazine staff of lying ones! Loved this all-too-true article about actresses and food. However, Rolling Stone continues to make my stomach turn.

In honor of Valentine's Day

A happy one to all!

Lazy Sunday

Two things:

1) Donald Glover from NBC's Community is Troy in real life, too, except for smarter. But just as funny and just as much of a pop culture nerd, which i love. Check this out.

2) Currently over at the Entertainment Weekly Grammys LiveBlog. Dancing around the room every time they decide I'm funny enough to re-publish a comment of mine. (Rarely). Come join!

The good, bad, and ugly over the past couple of days

Good:

Glee’s Valentine’s Day episode last night. For all of Glee’s flaws – and believe me, I know there are many – the best episodes are not the ones in which the show tries to be relevant and poignant and have fantastic, showy musical numbers and also make fun of itself but also take itself seriously, and give everyone screen time and have two celebrity guests. The best episodes are the ones where – simply – there are a couple really strong moments, and they outweigh the weak ones. Santana (the beautiful and talented Naya Rivera) finally got a plotline. Mark Salling committed to the ridiculousness of Puck crushing on Lauren, so it worked, and 10 points for his perfect delivery of “What is this place?” when she takes him to the library. Blaine sang a Robin Thicke song. Sighhhh. Kurt finally confronted him about all of their sexual tension, thank God. It was starting to look like a Josh and Donna West Wing situation for a little while there. Mercedes got to explain why she’s the one character that’s not desperate for a relationship – “Look at me. I don’t have a date for Valentine’s Day and I could give a rip. The three of us are divas...everybody feels lonely. Harnessing this pain is why [our heroes] became legends.” A nice response from the creators to the numerous bloggers wondering why they haven’t given her a love interest yet. And Rachel was suddenly self-aware (but devastatingly so) when she acknowledged that "girls like [her] don't usually get chosen over girls like Quinn." But still, Finn and Quinn are totally unlikeable, Kurt switched schools to get more personal attention and he hasn’t had one solo yet, and Tina crying during her song was decidedly un-funny. Ah, well…beggars can’t be choosers.

Colin Firth in the billions of interviews he’s had to do lately because of his King’s Speech Oscar buzz. He is the most humble, sweet, funny, and unaffected movie star out there, and he takes what he does with just the right mix of seriousness and humor. I would say he’s charming, because he is, but he doesn’t even mean to be. It is time for his Oscar, but really, after his performances in films like When Did You Last See Your Father? and A Single Man, of course it is time.

How I Met Your Mother went back to being funny! Other than the utterly useless Katy Perry cameo – God, she’s annoying – Monday’s episode was pitch-perfect. I loved seeing the story from everyone but Ted’s perspective for once – hilarious – and Marshall’s family getting as excited as we were that Zoe is finally single. WHY CAN’T SHE BE THE MOTHER? I LOVE DR. CAMERON!

The New York Times gets their balls back (don’t ask me when they lost them, I’m 20 years old) and finally reviews Spiderman: Turn Off the Dark. And totally eviscerates it. YES. About time.

I haven’t been crazy about House lately because I think the writers kind of screwed up House and Cuddy finally getting together, Wilson has been MIA, and I don’t like Candace Bergen at all, who has been playing Cuddy’s mom. But Mama Cuddy was the patient of the week on Monday, and House – for the first time ever – used the “Do it or you’re fired” line on his team when trying to save her. That’s the House I know and love! Enough of this one step forward, two steps back business with he and Cuddy. He literally threatened four people’s jobs to get them to save a woman he barely knows for the woman he loves. Nice.

This, because why the hell not?

Jesse Eisenberg on going to the Oscars: "I feel like when I was 13 and I had to go to bar mitzvahs every weekend. This is the same feeling. You have to put on a suit every weekend to go meet with a bunch of Jews."

Bad:

I DON’T CARE ABOUT MICHELLE OBAMA’S STYLE. And if you do, you need to find a hobby. I guess there’s this new book out about her fashion sense – really, a book? – and of course it’s getting a lot of press - female bloggers in particular are eating it up.

Annie’s cousin is trying to sabotage her on 90210. I'm yawning.

The incredibly strange way in which all of my favorite shows have ended up being ones aired during the summer – Mad Men, Weeds, Breaking Bad, and Friday Night Lights. No, I don’t have DirecTV. Leave me alone.

Artists releasing “teasers” of their music videos – Britney, I’m looking at you. Music videos are roughly three-minute long videos of you lipsyncing at a camera. Not that special and certainly not worthy of teasers to hype them up.

Ugly:

Gawker and Jezebel's new layouts. UGH.

Jude Law and Sienna Miller have broken up (again). I hate myself for saying this, but I was pulling for those two crazy kids. Now I’ll go to People.com and couples like J.Lo and Marc Antony or Blake Lively and Insert It Boy Here will somehow stay together and revel in their publicity and not be English or cute.

When does Sherlock start up again? I’ve watched the first season’s three episodes probably 20 times each now…

Just Go With It – the new romcom starring the mind-numbingly one-note Jennifer Aniston and completely unappealing Adam Sandler. Aren’t there already enough bad movies out there? Now there’s one in which it’s totally plausible that Adam Sandler would date Brooklyn Decker and Jennifer Aniston would agree to pretend to be his ex-wife? And it would be funny? And people would pay money to see it?

Weeeeelll, this just ended on a much more negative note than I intended…errr…I’ll post something happy ASAP!

HP to receive BAFTA honor

I know I use the term well-deserved too often on here, but this is something that really, really is. I can't even begin to explain why, because Harry's world was mine, my family's, my friends' - for 10 whole years. I'm holding off on saying goodbye to it for as long as possible.

Goodbye to The White Stripes and other news...

Today was the opposite of a slow news day, namely because of the official breakup of the incomparable White Stripes. Not really surprising - both Jack and Meg have had a number of projects on their own over the past few years - but sad nonetheless. Dianna Agron tweeted: "Now the White Stripes belong to us. 13 years is a great run." I think she hit the nail on the head. Also, rumors are a-swirling that Joseph Gordon-Levitt may be cast in Batman: The Dark Knight Rises. So exciting. I really hope it works out; Hollywood doesn't put him in half as many movies as they should. Would maybe-kind of-sort of make up for the complete miscasting of Anne Hathaway as Catwoman. Ugh. And finally, SNL booked Russell Brand for their February 12th show - which I'm psyched about - but Chris Brown is the musical guest. Umm, what? Wasn't he supposed to be blacklisted from like...everywhere...forever? If not, shouldn't he be??

PS - I just finished watching Never Let Me Go. A fantastic film, but should probably come with a "WARNING: NOT FOR THE FAINT OF HEART" label for those who haven't read the book. I was in tears 5 minutes in. And Andrew Garfield, as usual, just wrecked me. In the best possible way, he absolutely wrecked me. That kid can do no wrong.

I love iTunes

for this post alone, from customer reviews of The Social Network:

Subject line: "You have to watch this"

Review: Watch this.

Oscar nomz

Just three frustrating snubs this year for me. Christopher Nolan gets no Best Director nom for Inception; instead it goes to critical darlings Joel and Ethan Coen. The Town gets absolutely nothing. Oscars: learn to love blockbusters (yes, they can be smart, too) or you will stay irrelevant forever. No Best Supporting Actor nom for Andrew Garfield, which is just plain stupid. The Social Network worked because of his gorgeous performance. I effing love those crazy Tumblr kids for already creating this.

Also, all this Oscar insanity means it's time for this:

Things I love and hate this week

That's right; I only love and hate. I don’t feel things in the middle.

Love:

1) Two of my favorite shows returned this week – both comedies and both shows that have grown considerably since their freshman seasons – Parks and Recreation and Royal Pains. The return of Parks couldn’t have been any better, and the addition of Rob Lowe to the show was a genius move. On Royal Pains, the underrated and always hilarious Paul Costanzo got to show off some serious acting chops when he surprisingly started crying during a scene in which his father has a heart attack and then later on showed some serious anger at his situation. This is a new thing for Costanzo, whose resume includes movies like 40 Days and 40 Nights, Josie and the Pussycats and Road Trip, so it’s cool that Royal Pains realizes it can be a platform for Costanzo to be something other than the comic relief.

2) I’m not a huge fan of Jersey Shore, but I’ve somehow caught all of the third season so far. The famiglia is back at Seaside Heights, which means everything is in its right place. Like the eloquent Pauly D says, “it’s like coming home again.” The house working to cheer up Snooki on Thursday’s episode was adorable. But really, my favorite thing about the show is JWoww. I am trying not to be ashamed here. But she’s tough and she’s a good friend. And the new guy she likes is from New England. What’s up, home state.

3) This shot of the X-Men: First Class cast that the L.A. Times published earlier this week. Just seeing James McAvoy as Professor X and Michael Fassbender as Magneto is so exciting. The casting was done so well here. I really think this movie is going to be fantastic.

4) Tina Fey’s obscure reference to Grey Gardens on Thursday’s episode of 30 Rock. Liz Lemon holds a press conference as "Jack’s wife," complete with a Jackie O pillbox hat and a strange Kennedy-esque accent. She tells Jack that she was doing “Drew Barrymore's impression of that crazy lady.” That would be Drew Barrymore playing Little Edie in HBO’s Grey Gardens. Thank you, Liz, for speaking my language.

5) I suppose you could consider this old news, but it got a lot of traction on VH1’s Top 20 Countdown this week – Adele’s new song, “Rolling in the Deep.” I love her, but I love revenge songs even more. What other voice in pop music right now could sing “See how I’ll leave with every piece of you/ Don’t underestimate the things that I will do,” and sound so frighteningly sincere?

Hate:

1) Can How I Met Your Mother go back to being funny? I don’t doubt that every single member of the cast has the potential to be a dramatic ac-TOR, but unlike Royal Pains, the serious moments are uncomfortable and completely out of character for the show. The actors even seem unsure of themselves. I almost felt like I should be laughing at the funeral and then I felt guilty, and then I felt weird.

2) Oprah is going to reveal some big family secret on her new network, which makes me want to vomit, to put it lightly. Can she go away already? Or maybe just decide not to exploit her family? Would that be possible?

3) Entertainment Weekly’s current cover story, which claims that Glee is “leading TV’s gay-teen revolution,” particularly because the gay characters on Glee are not simply comic relief because of their flamboyance or feminine qualities, and are not one-dimensionally tortured because of their "gayness." Their relationships and lives are looked at and taken seriously. Sure – but Greek was actually one of the first shows of this “new class” of television to do that with the character of Calvin, and it isn’t even mentioned in the little blurb EW gives. Come on! The creator of Greek literally spells it out in this video from two years ago.

Golden Globes LiveBlog!

6:00 TVNZ: "Ah, Ryan Seacrest, we meet again."

6:03 Olivia Wilde starts the night off right fashion-wise with a gorgeous Marchesa dress. But her hair is a strange color and I don't like her bangs. If she had pulled off the whole look, I might have died of jealousy, so it's good that she didn't.

6:15 It's not normal that I just immediately recognized Kevin Spacey's voice in that Kayak ad.

6:19 Speaking of Kevin Spacey, there he is! I like his sunglasses! Weeeee!

6:20 Jennifer Love Hewitt, you are wearing a Jersey girl's high school prom dress. And you are orange. And you just tried to pronounce Hawaii like a native. Sorry.

6:26 Mark Salling gets flustered when Ryan Seacrest asks him if he's a "player" like his character. Kind of sweet but also kind of embarrassing that these Glee kids don't know how to manuver the red carpet (with the exception of Lea Michele).

6:29 Jayma Mays looks incredible. Love her.

6:38 Ricky Gervais: "Beer's not an alcoholic drink...it's like a soft drink."

6:43 Natalie Portman's dress is so ugly. Looks like a pink drape with a Christmas bow stuck on it. I am happy about this because I don't like her. Shadenfreude.

6:45 Jimmy Fallon - being the class act he is - shakes all the fans' hands he can reach.

6:48 Julie Bowen is her character on Modern Family. Jesse Tyler Ferguson, though! Guys!

6:52 Giuliana calls everyone "sweetie." Is this an Italian thing?

7:00 Ryan is interviewing my two favorite people in Hollywood at once - Jimmy Fallon and Jason Segel! Also, Heather Morris and Naya Rivera look fantastic. Heather Morris looked so good at the Fox Party the other night, too. Love to see Hollywood rookies shutting it down. A glimpse of January Jones' dress tells me she's continuing on her quest to convince us she's not Betty Draper by dressing like a fembot.

7:02 Jake Gyllenhaal and Jason Segel high-five. My heart grows ten sizes.

7:03 I wish Ryan would ask Jake Gyllenhaal about Taylor Swift. It's the elephant in the room, Seacrest...

7:05 Emma Stone was just kind of condescending? "Those are like apples and oranges, maaaan." Also, she looks like Lindsay Lohan lately, circa Herbie: Fully Loaded.

7:15 Jane Lynch is the most sincere person Ryan has ever interviewed and he doesn't know how to handle it.

7:27 Mila Kunis won't give details on how she lost weight for Black Swan, other than "you try to do it in heathiest way possible." Yikes...

7:28 RDJ is rocking the Sherlock hair and I am obsessed with it.

7:36 JON HAMM!

7:43 Megan Fox looks beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. Everyone is wearing pink tonight, but she's the only one who did it right.

7:53 Helen Mirren gives Tilda Swinton a huge hug. Really cute.

7:55 January Jones says there's no friction between the Mad Men cast because they "party a lot together." New life goal: sneak in to one of those parties.

8:03 Chris Noth nodding at the Sex and the City 2 airbrushing joke. Yes.

8:06 Andrew Garfield looks cute and Jeremy Renner broods. Also, the sky is blue. Best Supporting Actor in a Drama goes to...Christian Bale for The Fighter, as expected (and well deserved). I hope his speech has so many crazy hijinks.

8:07 Okay...he's doing very well! What he said about Mark having to play a quiet character in The Fighter so that his character could shine is so true. Very classy. Ohhh...and just when you think he's done it without losing his mind, he says something to Robert DeNiro that gets bleeped and takes his sweet time getting offstage. I suppose that's why we love him.

8:10 WOW! Katey Sagal is a total upset! I was going to throw something at my TV if it was Kyra Sedgwick.

8:17 Julianne Moore, why are you dressed like that?

8:21 A lot of guy love going on with this Carlos cast.

8:22 Everyone laughs nervously because Ricky Gervais made a Bruce Willis joke, and then there's Bruce Willis, looking like he's going to kill someone. But that's also just because that's how he always looks.

8:24 BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR IN A TV SERIES (DRAMA) SHOULD BE GOING TO AARON PAUL. I hate this category.

8:26 Actually I don't, because even though I think all Chris Colfer does is cry every episode, I saw Heather Morris' and Lea Michele's reactions and apparently got something in my eye so excuse me for a second.

8:27 I love Leighton Meester and I love her dress. Someone please tell me why Serena is the new Chanel girl and not Blair. Also, I just got excited because Leighton Meester and Hugh Laurie are in the same room, which reminds me that I cannot wait for The Oranges (their movie together).

8:34 I always forget that the Golden Globes doesn't have any boring categories. Every single one that comes along is exciting. Hope Best Actor in a TV Drama goes to Jon Hamm, but seeing Bryan Cranston with his Walt White hair again makes me nostalgic...and then there's Hugh Laurie, who is consistently good...meh, it's Steve Buscemi. Wait a minute, it's not Jon Hamm? "The Suitcase" should've made him a shoo-in.

8:36 Ugh, I hate when people have pre-written acceptance speeches.

8:38 Best TV Drama goes to Boardwalk Empire. Really? Is this going to be one of those things? That's really annoying. This was Mad Men's best season yet.

8:40 Angie fixing Brad's tie: okay, you got me. Cute.

8:44 Oh God, poor Andrew Garfield. That was really awkward. I think he needs to relax in general. Especially after reading that recent Details article, I like him less and less. Who is that girl sitting with Aaron Sorkin?

8:56 Every time I see The Biebs with a girl his age, she's taller than he is. Girls in his music videos included.

8:58 Hi, Jeremy Irons! Also, Helen Mirren and Robert Pattinson are at the same table, which makes me happy. British people! Why is Tom Hanks always shouting something at someone every time he's on camera? Shut up, Tom Hanks.

9:00 Gervais, you're lucky RDJ has a good sense of humor about his addict days, because he is craaazy  like a fox. Oh wait, RDJ goes off-book to call out Gervais for his mean-spirited humor. Nice. He then calls out all the ladies for not sleeping with him. Weeelll, they should be so lucky. Everyone's laughing but Angie and Anne Hathaway. Of course. Any way, this is totally inappropriate and anyone else doing this bit would be creepy but it's him, so it's okay.

9:02 Anette Benning's acceptance speech for Best Actress in a Comedy has a dash of Alice Ripley crazy going on. "THE AWARD FOR BEST PROMISING ACTOR IN 1996, MY HUSBAND." A well-deserved shout out to Julianne Moore, though: "Julianne, you are a class act. Thank you."

9:16 Another class act - Al Pacino. Loving Tilda Swinson's over-enunciation - "The Pillars of the EARTH." Also, ugh Claire Danes, at least try to look surprised (she just won for Best Actress in a Made for TV Movie).

9:24 It's the Zef! (That's Zac Efron, to all non-teeny boppers out there.) I love how his face is like, I've got this. It's strange how he's a vet compared to The Social Network cast, that girl from True Grit who I wish would go away, Justin Bieber, etc.

9:26 HAH. Steve Carrell pushes Ricky Gervais away when Gervais goes in for a hug.

9:27 Sorkin, you magnificent bastard. Your talent is palpable. But you are also an ass. Very sweet how supportive The Social Network table is. But the shoutout to Zuck was unnecessary (an entrenpreneur can still be a jerk) and thanks to some Jezebel viewers, I realize the "smart girls" comment was a thinly veiled insult at critics of The Social Network's sexism. Whatevs, I'm just glad Sorkin's writing (well) again. RIP West Wing.

9:29 Sofia Vergara, stop clapping for yourself so wildly.

9:32 Oh my goodness, the matchmaker in me loves seeing Mila Kunis and James Franco chit-chatting. Also, sorry, but Sandra Bullock looks like a hot mess.

9:41 Matthew Morrison cheers for Lea Michele. Look, not everyone hates her! There's hope for you yet, Lea.

9:49 Wow. Can't believe Steve Carrell didn't win for Best Actor in a TV Series (Comedy). Didn't Jim Parsons just win the Emmy for this role too? Kaley's reaction is so cute, though. I find it very hard to believe anyone has to deal with Parsons' "trying ways." He seems like a sweetheart.

9:50 YES! Jeremy Irons. Your voice. "ACK-tress." I'd listen to you read the damn phonebook. Oh my god, YES! Melissa Leo wins for Best Supporting Actress for The Fighter! She was so incredible in that movie. So horribly good. "All that and kissed by Jeremy Irons!! Look Mom, I got a golden Globe!" Oh, I LOVE HER! "Mark Wahlberg, you are a prince," she says, and Amy Adams nods in agreement. A gorgeous speech and an award that couldn't have and shouldn't have gone to anyone else.

10:03 Angie applying lip gloss and "whooping" for Robert DeNiro makes her human and I love it.

10:04 Time for DeNiro's Lifetime Achievement Award. Tom Hanks about to cry humanizes him, even though I still hatechu, Tom Hanks. Also, why isn't DeNiro crying? Don't you kind of have an obligation  to cry when you get a Lifetime Achievement Award?

10:15 I just gave Darren Aronofsky and his ironic hipster mustache the finger. So what, who cares? David Fincher wins for Best Director! Again, The Social Network table is thrilled. Andrew Garfield, you are redeeming yourself. Sorkin gives Fincher a kiss on the cheek, Fincher gives a great speech and calls his cast "The Dream Team." Love it.

10:18 January Jones, your dress is so bad! It's literally tattered at the bottom. The Glee clip shows Mr. Schu clapping earnestly, and I miss how good Season 1 was. Glee wins for Best TV Series (Comedy), and I wish Ryan Murphy wasn't so smarmy.

10:26 Time for Best Actor in a Comedy/Musical. Hahahhhaaaaa, Johnny Depp just giggled to himself when Halle Berry said his name twice. Paul Giamatti? Really? Giamatti accepts his award from Halle Berry and then proceeds to murmur her name. She looks nervous and is probably praying she won't get Adrien Brody-style kissed again.

10:27 Giamatti says his fellow nominees are above him in every regard, and Gyllenhaal CRACKS UP. I LOVE IT!

10:35 Natalie Portman wins for Black Swan. I hate you, Black Swan. Natalie Portman was obviously expecting it, but her speech is still super awkward. Harvard!

10:46 Sandra Bullock wasn't at all who I saw playing the mom in Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, so I hope the movie still works. Again, The Social Network table goes nuts when Jesse Eisenberg's name is called during the list of nominees for Best Actor in a Drama.

10:48 And in a surprise to absolutely no one, Colin Firth wins the category. Love him. And he gives a very charming, very British acceptance speech - without a piece of paper. Thank you, Mr. Darcy.

10:55 Love the huge standing O for Michael Douglas. RDJ pumps his fist in the air. Very, very sweet. Best Picture goes to...The Social Network. Really cool. Seriously, this was such a film. Kevin Spacey (a producer of the film) gets a kiss on the cheek from - again - Aaron Sorkin. The Trent Reznor music in the background makes the whole thing really emotional too. Of COURSE Jesse and Andrew stay sitting at the table until they are made to come up on stage. Andrew can't even look at the audience; he has to turn around. The producer thanks everyone for an amazing year in movies, and that's really quite true - because it was a better year than most. 

Lively and Holmes

Two Vulture items that struck my fancy today...

1. This article says that Blake Lively is appealing to both men and women. Err, she doesn't appeal to any women I know. She was impressive in The Town, but is completely Serena-esque in everything else (real life included). Doe eyes and a constant air of "who, me?" does not an appealing actress make.

2. I don't have words for this. HOLMES! So excited.

Greek "Fools Rush In" Recap: But if you try sometimes...

Greek is back! Well, it’s the second episode of the new (and final) season. Forgive me for not recapping the first one…I was actually writing a paper for school instead. Anyway, here goes:

Casey is sleeping on Rusty’s couch, and Dale is there reading a book-slash-watching her sleep. Oh Daley, your behavior doesn’t even faze me any more. He laughs, which wakes her up, and explains that he’s looking to join a club, find a woman who is wifey material before he graduates. Casey suggests he join a fraternity, and Dale’s all, um, don’t you remember I was the president of University Students Against Greeks a couple years ago? Yeah.

Rusty comes in and trips over a bunch of Casey’s boxes, and tells her she basically needs to get a place stat. She agrees, but everywhere in her price range is already rented (she unexpectedly got into CRU Law just last week). They banter for a bit about cereal choices and who their parents love more - their rapport is one of the things I will miss the most about Greek when it ends. Any way, when Rusty’s girlfriend Dana comes in, Casey tells them that for as long as she’s here, if they want to watch Star Wars at 3 AM, they need to at least turn down the volume. They get awkward and leave, and Dale says, “you know Rusty doesn’t have a TV in his room, right?” Casey doesn’t buy it – she heard the scene where they blow up the Death Star like 10 times last night. Dale explains (by reenacting the scene) that it’s actually Dana and Rusty having nerd sex. Cuuuuute.

Kappa Tau house. Cappie is holding a meeting about Rush Week, and Rusty – who is Rush Chair – tells the guys that it’s all up to “karmic synergy” as usual. FYI, this is the frat’s term in previous seasons for letting rushies come to them instead of actually recruiting/putting in any effort whatsoever. Suddenly Rusty realizes there’s a ton of people missing from the meeting. No pledges, no one in his class either – wait, where is Ben Bennett?! Kappa Tau is shrinking, and they need rushies, bad. Cappie tells everyone not to worry, but after all the guys leave, he tells Rusty that they should be very worried.

Omega Chi house. Everyone is mad at Prez Calvin because last episode it was revealed (by Dale) that Calvin tried to end the feud with the Kappa Taus. The Omega Chis don’t think the feud should be ended; those guys suck, it’s a waste of their time, and if you want to go waaay back, Calvin’s truce with the Kappa Taus ruined the OC’s spring break. Calvin understands where they’re coming from, but isn’t apologetic. He thinks he can earn back their trust.

Back at the KT house, Cappie asks Rusty, “How did we loose so many guys? I feel like Jen Aniston!” Hah. Cappie admits “karmic synergy” isn’t a real thing, and Rusty hilariously feigns surprise for Cappie’s sake. Cap thinks they should try to recruit this time around, so they go to sign up for rush activities. Cappie: “Hi…we’re here to try…?” But they’ve missed the deadlines for everything. There’s a rally but there are no booth spaces left.

Evan and Casey walk and talk about law school and leaving Greek life behind. I’d be really surprised if she doesn’t start having feelings for him soon, but the promos for later this season show her and Cappie getting back together. Any way, he’s all ready to move on from the Omega Chis, but Casey’s clearly not ready to let go of the ZBZs. Evan gets her to admit she wants to go visit the house, and she’s on her way.

Calvin goes to Evan to ask for forgiveness for making the truce with the KTs behind Evan’s back, saying the house has forgiven him, so Evan should too. Calvin says they just had a meeting and the guys aren’t happy, but they’re giving him another chance. He’s still president. Evan says that the house must be more forgiving than he is, and Calvin leaves, dejected.

Casey is back visiting the ZBZ house (cue my secondhand embarrassment for her). Charisma Carpenter, playing a ZBZ overseer from last season named Tegan, shows up and tells Rebecca she needs a “house mom,” and it somehow comes out that Casey doesn’t have a place to stay yet. Tegan is like, “Perfect! Casey will be your house mom for Rush Week,” and everyone’s face is like “Ugh,” especially Rebecca, but Casey honestly doesn’t look that upset. In the kitchen, Rebecca tells Casey to stay out of her way while she’s there, and even though Casey thinks she can help Rebecca with Tegan, Rebecca’s not hearing it. Tegan comes in and says they need to get ready for the rally, where Casey’s attendance is mandatory as house mom, and so is her wearing an apron and hairnet.

Dana and Rusty work on some science thing. He tells her about the KTs lack of rushies and rush activities, and she suggests they set up a “rebel booth” in the area next to all the regular rush booths at the rally. He likes the idea and leaves to tell Cappie.

Umm, then the cutest moment ever happens. At the ZBZ house, Rebecca is freaking out about everything she has to do for the rally, and Evan walks in and just kisses her and says hi. “Hi,” she says, and she’s all softened. AWW! And it’s not cheesy, because it’s Rebecca. Dale is obviously hanging out at the ZBZ house and bumps into Evan, who he proceeds to lecture about not forgiving Calvin for hiding the truce. Evan lectures Dale back on what brotherhood means, and Dale actually seems to get it. “Without the loyalty and camaraderie of your brothers, fraternities are just a place to drink beer and chase girls,” Evan says. Which is cool. Because it’s taken five seasons, but Evan is no longer shallow.

The rally. Calvin and Heath kiss and Heath says, “You’re going to love my sister,” so I guess she’s a freshman that’s rushing. Evan talks to one of the Omega Chi guys, who reveals they’re impeaching Calvin after Rush Week – just keeping him in office for now because “it’s all about having a strong public face.” Evan says he’ll stop by the OC house later to help with rush. Cappie says hi to Casey, and it’s pretty awkward. Some ZBZ girl interrupts and tells Casey that she needs to do damage control – Tegan is micro-managing Rebecca, and Rebecca isn't taking very well to it. Heath comes over to introduce his sister Heather (no, I’m not kidding) to the ZBZ girls. Tegan and Rebecca end up arguing in front of her and it’s really uncomfortable, so Heather leaves. 

The KTs start playing loud music at their rebel booth. A bunch of guys come over to check it out – “Even Timmy’s getting into it,” says Beaver. That’s Beaver’s snake, which he brought along for some reason. Then some sprinklers go on, somehow electrocute/blow up the speakers, and a fire starts. All the guys that had come over disperse quickly, and the Kappa Tau sign hanging from the booth catches on fire. Symmmbooollliiiism.

After the rally, Casey and Cap talk, and he tells her that he’s changing, growing up, case in point – he’s making an effort to get pledges. She’s not happy. She says something to the effect of “I’m sorry, but I want you to be better because you want to be better, not because I want you to,” and walks away.

Back at the Kappa Tau house, they grieve the loss of potential pledges (and Timmy) because of the fire. Cappie says they’re going back to karmic synergy. “When we try,” he says, “snakes die.”

Rusty’s house. Calvin is talking to Rusty about how ridiculous it is that Evan won’t forgive him. Dale tries to tell Calvin that it’s because Evan values brotherhood, and Rusty and Calvin are like, "Maaaan, what do you know about brotherhood? ...Wait a minute...are you rushing a fraternity?" Dale says yes. “Which one of you little maniacs wants to bid me first?”

ZBZ house. Tegan and Rebecca bicker some more. Casey bangs a vacuum (house mom cleaning duties) into the legs of a table until Rebecca comes over and tells her to go around the table, not at it – ohhhh! “Is this your lame way of telling me to go around Tegan instead of at her?” Casey tells Rebecca that she’s not a good president if she’s too proud to accept help from time to time. Casey has an idea.

KT guys are setting up for their annual house party during Rush Week, the one rush activity they always participate in. And by participate, I mean they secretly have alcohol at the party, which is illegal during Rush Week, so they get a bunch of kids to come to the house. Rusty tells the guys to gather 'round and announces that he's made a list of 20 guys that he thinks would be great KTs. One kid is heir to a brewery, one kid has pet snakes…and so on. The guys love it. Rusty tells them they’ve got to try, one last time. Try to “rush the crap outta these guys.” Cappie is inspired: “THIS TIME WE’RE DOING IT FOR ME! I mean...us.”

House party at ZBZ. Rooney’s “I Can’t Get Enough” is playing. Well done, Greek! Such a good song. Looks like Casey’s plan is in motion – Rebecca tells Tegan that a legacy is there that Tegan should talk to – legacies are good for ZBZ and I think the family Rebecca is talking about is wealthy or something. Presumably this is to get Tegan off her back. The legacy is, surprise surprise, Dana pretending to be a legacy. Tegan goes over and butters her up: “Maybe you’ll even find a husband!” Dana: “That’s old fashioned! …And great!” Across the room, Rebecca asks Casey why she thinks Rusty’s girlfriend is up to this, and Casey’s like, girl, she’s an astrophysicist. She can memorize facts like you wouldn’t believe. Rebecca gathers some ZBZs and tells them that Tegan’s distracted – which means they can rush girls without having Tegan hover, criticize, etc. They divide and conquer as Casey looks on approvingly.

Dale is at Omega Chi’s house party. The OCs aren't really grooving to him, but their ears perk up when he tells them he was the one that outed Calvin’s truce. Remember Season 1, when Calvin was hoping no one would out him? Calvin talks with Evan, and they both agree they have been too hard on one another – as brothers and as fellow presidents. Evan tells Calvin that the OCs are going to take away his presidency and offers to talk to them out of it. But Calvin refuses his help and accepts that the OCs are gonna do what they're gonna do. Good for him.

Kappa Tau house party. Dale is there and pretty much steals Rusty’s thunder when he’s trying to intimidate the rushies, shouting, “laaame!” But Rusty goes with it, and the party is underway.

Clean up at ZBZ. In the kitchen, Rebecca, Casey and Tegan talk about how great it is that they might get a legacy. Tegan’s like, yep…if she wasn’t a fake. She was good, but I asked her about Prada and she thought I was talking about a museum. Tegan tells Rebecca she’s going to have to re-think her presidency and maybe even choose which girls they’re going to give bids to. Casey interrupts, saying Tegan hasn’t given Rebecca a chance, and that it’s Rebecca’s right as president to choose bids. Tegan agrees, and asks if she can trust Rebecca, and Rebecca gives some sarcastic comment, but basically says yes. The ZBZ chick who was Kelsey in High School Musical opens the door and tells the girls it’s voting time, and poor Casey is like, “Yay! I’ll go get my sleeping bag!” Rebecca (actually pretty gently) tells her she doesn’t have a vote – she’s not an active any more.

KT house. Rusty tells Cappie there’s a rushie he wants Cap to meet – Dale! Cappie loves it and Dale apologizes for creating USAG and all is well. A KT is talking to some guy Rusty doesn’t recognize from the list – the KT explains he’s a legacy. Rusty: “Cool, he’s in!” Everyone is happy and Cappie tells Rusty that HE DID IT! But then the music is shut off, and there’s our old friend Officer Huckabee. No alcohol at parties during Rush Week. Cap tries to do damage control – “This is a dry soiree! Can I get you a Roy Rogers, extra grenadine?” Huckabee: “Yes, thank you.” Any way, Cappie may know his drink of choice, but Huck’s not about to be made a fool of. He shuts down the party and sends everyone go home.

ZBZ house – Tegan and Casey continue cleaning the kitchen while the ZBZ girls deliberate in the next room. Casey tells Tegan that not being a part of ZBZ kills her, but she doesn’t want to be that girl that can’t let go as well – she doesn’t know “how to care the right way.” Tegan tells her she took her job as a mentor because it’s her way of staying a part of ZBZ without being a sorority girl any more. She explains why she's so tough, too - “Riding the girls makes them better sisters,” she says. “I want ZBZ to be the best it can be. It’s my job.”

Back at KT, grieving again. One party and they’re broke and have lost all of their potential pledges. Wait a minute – Peter Parks, the legacy from the party, stops by to check on the status of his bid. Cappie realizes that the school's not going to stop KT from rushing a legacy. Everyone’s excited – “we can call him Spiderman!” – and he’s got a bid.

Tegan is leaving, and on her way out, she strongly advises Rebecca to find a house mom. “Casey!” says Rebecca, and quelle surprise, Casey accepts. After Tegan heads out, Rebecca tells Casey she won’t be needing any more help – but guys? I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Dobler’s! God, it’s been too long! Calvin tells Evan the guys let him resign to avoid impeachment. Still – way harsh, Tai. Dale shows up and tells Calvin and Evan that Omega Chi gave him a bid, and walks away to socialize with his new potential brothers. From deductive reasoning, Cal and Evan realize that Dale was the one that called the cops on the KT party last night. Sheesh.

Broadway news

History Boys vet Stephen Campbell Moore is back on Broadway! Hooray! Yet another reason I need to go to London at some point this summer, cough, Mom. Also, Bloody Bloody Andrew Jackson closed on the 2nd but I was too depressed to write about it. In the Heights closed on the 9th, but it's okay because they're making the movie so I can watch it (and this) any time I want.

J.J. Abrams continues to be the coolest nerd in H-Wood

I love this interview. Abrams is like a little kid that knows he's done something kind of stupid but doesn't regret it, because it was fun, and it looked awesome. On the continuous lens flares in Star Trek, he says, "It was ridiculous...but...I love the idea that the future was so bright it couldn't be contained in the frame." You have to hand it to him. I love the honesty - not only does he get the complaint, because he's a fan too, but he admits that it was an attempt to make the film beautiful, and isn't apologetic about that.

Example of a lens flare: